"And I felt that I had overcome by seeing pink rays of light caressing my features. A most qualified youth with big strong arms whispering I had finally arrived. I did smile when I saw the clouds descend that actually turned out to not be clouds but drops of sweat coming from manly nipples and hairy layered thighs. I looked in awe once men drew nearer. Young men I had only imagined to ever exist, but so far had never seen before in their actual physical form. Only in a disfigured non-physical alternative online dimension that I could not enter, except if I fell apart into a billion digital particles, we had met before. Here though, I was complete. My body had not left me but had stayed to deliver upon my senses the most gratifying of urges leading to orgasmic outbursts that I could not control. BOYTOPIA, where youth is eternal and always satisfying. Where beauty is the source of life that keeps man breathing, moaning, gasping. A place where secrets are merely revelations. Where pain and tears and heartbreak are only reminders of our past and the past only returns every so often to re-exhilarate the future. He who had whispered now took my hand and made me follow. The grass felt soft underneath my feet like pillows or candy floss. They too followed. Young gods with sun bronzed torsos staggering smoothly, wobbly, but strong. Their strength was pure addiction. Their veins pumping. Their pulse still beating hard from their time spent on lifting weights. Young Adonis. You God. You shining steed. You make my lips tingle. You make me want to drink your sweat and choke upon your breath. You are my gold. You are my Eden. You are my unforsaken truth. Lead me to your fountain where I can sip from your aesthetics. Together we will ride this rainbow home."

 

A MYRIAD

Live performance (8 min.)

2014

 

A MYRIAD is a short demure performance that I developed especially for 'EXPERIENCE 2', a performance night taking place in 'De Gouden Garage' Breda, in which the idea of wanting to belong and idealizing myself are most important. By doing push-ups I get my body ready and sculpted like the boys who spend their time at the gym. Apart from a strong admiration and desire I have for these boys I long to become one of them and enter their group of young Adonis-like men. When ready I get to enter 'BOYTOPIA' and live among these men as being one of their own. 


All images are video stills from the video by Lars Reen